How To Change Anything

Connor Hill
Jun 26
4 min read

Okay, here’s the thing. You want to change something in your life, but you don’t know where to start? It’s easier than you think. You only need four questions. Yup, you heard me — four questions to change nearly anything in your life. And the best part? They work. Every time.

The questions are simple:

That’s it. That’s all you need. But you’re probably sitting there thinking, “What do you mean? What is it? What do I do with it? How do I even apply that?” Don’t worry, I’m gonna break it down for you.

The Problem with “Why”

First, let’s talk about why most people are stuck. We tend to get caught up in "Why?" Why is this happening? Why does this hurt? Why is this person being so annoying? Why is the world the way it is?

But guess what? Why never changes anything. Ever. It just leads you to the next “why,” and the next “why,” and then suddenly, you’re lost in a sea of endless explanations with zero solutions. (I’ve been there, trust me.)

Let’s ditch the “why” and focus on the questions that actually lead you to a different reality.

The Power of Asking Questions

Here’s a little nugget of wisdom that’ll change your life (if you let it): Every problem is actually a possibility with a point of view attached to it. That’s right. A problem is just a point of view that you’ve decided to see as a “problem.”

For example, think about something in your life that’s frustrating you right now. You’ve probably been asking yourself, “Why does this keep happening?” But here’s the truth: you don’t need to ask why. All you need are these four questions.

So let’s take the example of traffic (because who doesn’t love complaining about traffic?):

What is it? Well, it's traffic. We know that part.
What do I do with it? You could keep complaining about it. Or maybe you could look at it and say, “Hmm, what’s possible here? What else could I choose?”
Can I change it? Maybe you can. Maybe you can’t. Either way, not knowing is not a roadblock.
If so, how do I change it? Well, if you can change it, maybe you could choose a different route or leave earlier. Or if it’s completely out of your control, you could choose to enjoy the time you’re spending in traffic rather than resisting it.

Notice the shift here. You’re not stuck in why. You’re asking questions that create awareness, not just answers. That’s what changes things.

The Real Magic: Choice

Here's the kicker: Your choice creates.

Yep, your choice. By asking these questions, you begin to create awareness. And the awareness is where the magic happens. The moment you ask a question, you bypass the whole story of “why” and step into the space of possibility.

You’re not figuring out why things are happening, you’re opening up to how things could change — just by choosing to ask a different question.

How to Apply This

You can apply these questions to anything you’re trying to change. I know, I’ve used them in all facets of my own life, and it’s amazing how quickly things can shift once you stop getting stuck in the “why” and just start asking the questions.

So let’s say you’re feeling stuck in a job that you hate. Start asking:

What is it? It’s a job I don’t enjoy. That’s the reality.
What do I do with it? What else is possible here? Could I change something about my perspective? Or maybe it’s time to change jobs entirely?
Can I change it? If I choose to, yes. It’s all about me and my choices.
If so, how do I change it? What other job could I choose? What would be more fun? Or do I need to step into something entirely different?

By simply asking these questions, you’ll start to see things you didn’t notice before. The awareness that shows up will guide you to a new space. It’s a game-changer.

Your New Best Friend: Awareness, Not Answer

Remember, the purpose of asking questions isn’t to get answers. It's to gain awareness.

Your answers will show up in the form of possibilities. The more you ask these questions, the more you’ll start seeing what’s available to you. And the best part? You don’t need to have all the answers right away. Just asking the question shifts the energy.

So, next time you find yourself stuck, confused, or questioning why things are happening, don’t go looking for the “why.” Instead, ask yourself: